Expat Lifestyle: The Art Of Third Chapter Living, Expats Crossing Cultures

By Doreen Cumberford

When we packed our belongings and bid farewell to familiar shores, many of us embarked on more than a geographical relocation—we began a profound reinvention of ourselves. For those of us who've chosen to spend our "third chapter" abroad, is it possible that this adventure represents perhaps our most meaningful work yet? Far from the traditional concept of retirement as a withdrawal, we expats find ourselves engaged in a different sort of productivity. Our days are filled with the challenges and rewards of cross-cultural living, a vocation that doesn't appear on any CV but shapes us more profoundly than many careers ever could.

By accident, and rarely by design, we become, unofficial ambassadors. In the queue at the local market, we can innocently find ourselves fielding questions about our homeland's politics or explaining cultural quirks on the streets.  Simultaneously, those video calls with family back home become gentle educational sessions about our adopted country's approach to healthcare, community, or the concept of time.

"Why do the British apologize for everything?" asks one of our new friends with genuine curiosity. Later that same day, we found ourselves explaining to friends back home why three-hour lunches are most definitely not a lazy habit, but rather are a celebration of life's proper priorities, and mental health cornerstones. These micro moments of translation—not just of language but of cultural perspective—create invisible bridges between worlds. Nothing strips away one's pretensions quite like attempting to explain a medical condition in a language you've only partially mastered, or realizing you've been mispronouncing the name of your street for six months. Each blunder becomes a lesson in humility and a chance to demonstrate that most valuable of skills: laughing at oneself.

Many of us spent decades in professions where expertise was expected and competence assumed. Now we willingly place ourselves in situations as perpetual beginners where we are finding a new identity. Yes, there is a very curious liberation in this—a reminder that growth requires vulnerability. The dignity we once found in professional mastery, we now discover in the grace with which we handle our inevitable and constant mistakes. It's no accident that sports like pickleball have become an unofficial pastime of expat communities worldwide. On these courts, we forge friendships that transcend language barriers. Between rallies, we exchange recommendations for plumbers, doctors, and the best local restaurants. Information becomes our currency, and those who can navigate both worlds become valued community resources.

And isn't there something wonderful about a game that's accessible to aging bodies yet offers endless scope for improvement? Like our expatriate journey itself, pickleball rewards patience, adaptability, and the willingness to learn new rules.

I like to call ourselves "rewired" rather than "retired" because it perfectly captures our experience and how can we retire when we are not “tired”? We haven't disconnected—we've simply rerouted our energies and attention. Many of us find deep purpose and satisfaction by volunteering, mentoring local students in English, or applying professional skills to community challenges. Others discover latent artistic talents that our busy careers never permitted. This rewiring extends to our neural pathways as well. Research consistently demonstrates that learning new languages, navigating unfamiliar environments, and building fresh social networks provides tremendous cognitive benefits. Our brains, like our perspectives, remain wonderfully plastic. Perhaps most valuably, we become living examples that reinvention is possible at any age. By transplanting ourselves into new soil, we demonstrate that curiosity needn't diminish with time. We discover that comfort zones, while pleasant, are rarely where growth happens.

We become collectors of human stories and keepers of perspective. Having witnessed different approaches to life's universal challenges, we can offer gentle reminders that there's rarely just one "correct" way to live.  Expanding our vision is perhaps our greatest contribution—both to our adopted communities and to friends and family observing our journey from afar.

So, while our business cards may no longer list impressive titles, make no mistake—we're still  working. Building bridges, fostering understanding, and perhaps, in our small way, making our interconnected world slightly more compassionate and considerably more interesting.

The salary is rubbish, the benefits unparalleled, and the position open to all who dare to apply!

Doreen Cumberford, author of "Life in the Camel Lane: Embrace the Adventure" and "Arriving Well," currently writing "Unsettled: When Home Doesn't Feel Like Home," a guide to repatriation after living abroad and host of "Nomadic Diaries Podcast" www.nomadicdiariespodcast.com